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Friday, 5 March 2021

Living with Mother

On Wednesday evening last I moved in with my mother: she fell and fractured her hip and so, my sisters, and I are taking turns to stay with her.  My new office is the upstairs back bedroom - south facing but I'm perpetually frozen. That's old houses for you.    

I'm watching Coronation Street, Fair City and East Enders.  It's torture.  

This morning, I think I accidentally poisoned myself.  Being back in the home of my childhood, I'm 12 years old again wandering into her bedroom trying on her makeup, using her face creams, and nosing around to see what interesting books she might have to read.  On her nightstand was a spray bottle.  It said Magnesium with black pepper and peppermint.  My son is always raving about how magnesium is good for muscles and the brain.  

The instructions said 5-10 sprays, so I sprayed it five times under my tongue.  It tasted utterly foul but like a good girl, I swallowed it. 

The worse something tastes the better for you, right?  Wrong.  I read the instructions again. It said spray directly onto the muscles.  I've been spitting and drinking gallons of water ever since.  My throat is on fire.  

On a positive note, her bathroom scales are telling me I'm a stone lighter.  I checked with my sisters, they said it makes them heavier.  I'll wait until my son calls and get him to check his weight.  Also, her mirrors are more flattering than mine.  I might take one of them home with me.

I don't miss Alan.

I'm having a Zoom 'meeting' with my Singapore buds tomorrow night.  The can of Bulmers is chilling as we speak and there is the rugby to look forward to.  Come on Ireland!

Have a fab weekend!!





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